04Jan

Are We Becoming Emotionally Weaker and More Fearful?

As 2018 kicked in, I gave brief thanks for missing all the negative Twitter & Facebook memes I heard about.

I rejoiced when I noticed positive and uplifting memes.

I gave thanks for my choice to pay attention to only those validated facts that contribute to my understanding of our world.

I gave thanks for my choice to turn off journalists who ask stupid questions like “How do you feel…?”; “Who’s to blame…?”; “Why do you think they did that?”

I’m dumbfounded by people who feel hurt by social media trolls.

Could it mean they believe the trolls, otherwise why would they feel hurt?

Have they not been taught to simply dismiss untruths?

Or have they been taught to worry about other peoples’ thoughts – which can never be known by anyone except the owner of those thoughts.

I see too much evidence of our emotionally weakening state and growing fears, in schools and other institutions, the workplace, in the social media, everywhere.

I’m bemused by the overprotective social justice fiends who keep disempowering people by championing their hurt feelings and seeking the unrealistic outcome of quietening the trolls.

Humans do that, they troll, taunt, tease and abuse when they feel justified in so doing, whether “right” or “wrong”.   It’s a right in democracy, to speak freely.   Whether it hurts anyone is a choice made by the hearer.

Offense is taken, and not automatically given.

To not take offense is to effectively disempower the offence giver, whether the intention is to offend or not.

I’m annoyed by the number of people caught out making false claims, about being bullied or harassed, only to be discovered as being disengaged or resisting change, or rightly overlooked for promotion.

True bullies and harassers can be shut down effectively and respectfully by asking appropriate questions such as “What are you trying to achieve with this behaviour?”, “Is there another way you can speak to me that might actually work?”, “Are you acting in full honour of our values right now?”

If the bullying is physical, it can be reported.  However, you can defend yourself too.  Just be careful you don’t overdo it!

I’m more annoyed by overly risk-averse HR practitioners who don’t help supervisors and employees to get real about unacceptable behaviour and performance, preferring to weakly:

  • tell them to go back and talk to each other more, or
  • take the side of the noisy complainer, or
  • do nothing.

It is also useful to remember that all our issues, conflicts and concerns are caused by fear, useless habits and ignorance.

All our issues, conflicts and concerns can be remedied by courage, better practice and continuous learning.

Please feel free to comment.

Happy new year!

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