Gary and Kevin came to the insurance company as commerce graduates at the same time. That was in 2006 when technology was beginning to noticeably impact business.
Over a period of ten years they both progressed to the role of managers in their departments, each reporting to a general manager.
Both were regarded well by staff and management, and they were both friendly, helpful and competent.
At the beginning of 2016, the insurance company began to take on new artificial intelligence resulting in a plan to downsize various departments.
Without warning, each were called into their respective general manager’s office and given a redundancy package in keeping with the company new strategic plan. The packages were generous, leaving no room for disagreement or argument.
Gary and Kevin weren’t the only ones to go, but they were the first, and struggling with the news they met for coffee later that afternoon to discuss what had just happened and the ramifications to each of their lives.
Gary was fuming with anger, and in no uncertain terms and language laid out what he thought of the company and their tactics.
His tirade was full of negativity and venom.
Kevin listened quietly as he doodled on a serviette, giving Gary an uninterrupted opportunity to vent his anger.
Noticing Kevin’s silence, Gary said suddenly, “Well, what do you think? You haven’t made a single comment! Don’t you think this is downright wrong?”
Kevin took a moment as he folded his serviette, and said: “I can understand how you feel, Gary, but I just want some time to consider everything first.”
He called the waiter over and after ordering a second cup of coffee, took a moment before quietly saying: “Personally I can understand why the company’s going down this path. This is the future. And now we have plenty of time to readjust and consider our own careers and future. This could be an opportunity!”
“But it’s not fair” continued Gary “What if I can’t get another position?”
Minutes of strained silence passed, when eventually Gary angrily pushed his chair back, his face puffed and red.
He said: “I’ve got to go. I can’t stand this situation. Sitting here is not helping me. I’m going home. Don’t know what I’m going to say to the wife. She’ll be angry too. And scared. Great package or not, we’ve got a big mortgage and kids at school.”
“OK Gary” said Kevin “Let’s stay in touch eh?”
Kevin stayed awhile, made some notes, and when he left, he smiled at the waiter and said “Thanks, that was good coffee.”
A Turning Point
A week later Gary called Kevin and suggested meeting again for coffee.
As they sat together in the corner of the coffee lounge, it was instantly and patently clear to Kevin that Gary was still struggling and hadn’t moved beyond his previous disappointment and confusion.
“Gary, why did you call? What are you hoping I can help you with?”
Gary paused… and then asked the leading question: “What are you doing about the situation?”
Kevin’s Plan
“I’ve made a list of everything I’m great at. Everything I’d like to do, and a list of those things I need to learn to ensure I can add value to my next role.
I believe we’re in times of massive change. But we’re smart. We’ve got good track records. And we can still learn.
I’m going to use my redundancy package to get ready for a new role, and that might mean learning something new. I see this as a great opportunity. ”
Gary said nothing as he stirred his coffee, and Kevin continued…
“Look mate, what good will it do you to stay stuck and angry? The situation is what it is, and only you can change in. The question is how?”
Gary stopped stirring his coffee and a hush settled over their corner table.
“I’m going to give you the contact details of someone who can help you – as he helped me. It will cost a bit, but I swear, you won’t regret it. It’s the reason why I was calm and centred when we got the news of the redundancy…while you appeared to psychologically collapse. It’s a skill to be learned!”
Attitudinal Competence
Kevin now had a captured audience, and said: “Attitudinal Competence is something we can all learn, and I believe something we should have been taught earlier in life.”
“When did you do this?” asked Gary. “You’ve never told me about this before.”
“I did it two years ago, when my wife and I had some hiccups in our marriage. At the same time my father was dying and we had some financial pressures due to my wife helping her brother. It all got messy and we were on the verge of splitting up.
I did some searching on the net and discovered that we could learn the skill of Attitudinal Competence. It enables you to adapt your feelings, think effectively and make better choices for action.
We found the guy who had developed the training for the skill and went to him. It was the best thing we could have done. It got us through our mess and it’s helping me now to move forward effectively. I honestly suggest you should give it a go.”
“Hmm, how do I know it will work for me?’ asked Gary.
“Well it’s worked for everyone I know who’s acquired the skill. Before I took it on, I was very much like you are now. Stuck with being upset and unable to think in ways that worked. Those negative thoughts were stuck in my head and stopping me from thinking properly and even stopping me from sleeping. I was headed on a downward spiral.
Honestly Gary, if I can do it, so can you.”
As he spoke, Kevin wrote the details on a serviette and passed it over the table to Gary.
“What have you got to lose? ”
Results
A month later Gary called Kevin again. “Let me buy you a coffee” he said.
Two days later - and only five weeks since receiving their redundancy news - the two friends sat happily at their favoured corner table.
Gary reached across and shook Kevin’s hand. “Thanks mate, you’ve been a great friend. I took your advice, and I can tell you….it’s made all the difference!”
“So what’s happening?” asked Kevin as they settled into their chairs.
“I’ve decided to go back to Uni to learn coding. With my managerial skills and industry knowledge I figure they’ll need people like us who can also understand computer code and adapt technology to be even more effective. And of course, we’ll also be able to lead the people who operate the system” , Gary said this some obvious passion, and asked, “And what have you decided?”
Kevin smiled and said “I’m studying to become an executive coach. I want everyone to learn Attitudinal Competence as a fantastic foundation to their career and lives - especially if they want to become leaders.”
They sat in comfortable silence, smiling.
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