POFGAR™: A Six-Part Attitude Framework for Resilience, Forged in Conflict, Covert Operations and a Brain Tumour.
In 2004 I finished writing a book called Master the Power of Your Attitudes. It was about attitudinal competence; the ability to master your thoughts, master your feelings, improve your belief system, and think on Manual rather than Automatic. The outcomes I was after were simple: people who are positive, adaptable and resilient. That work has served me and my clients very well for more than two decades.
Then life set me an exam on my own material.
On 10 May 2026 I had a seizure. I was diagnosed with a brain tumour, and on 22 May a tumour measuring 4 centimetres by 3.5 by 3 was removed from my right prefrontal lobe. Very fortunately, it hasn’t impacted me cognitively in any way. Radiation and chemotherapy are likely to follow; as I write this on 12 June, I haven’t started treatment yet, but I’ve been set up for it. I know it will take its toll and that Iโll recover completely.
Since the operation, I’ve had time to think about a lot of what I do in my work. I realised that the attitude I needed to deal effectively with this tumour, and with the treatment to come, had to work better than โwellโ. I want to keep providing my service. It is my calling, and Iโm committed to it.
So, what would I choose for my attitude?
I chose to be positive, optimistic, factual, grateful, adaptable and resilient. The acronym is POFGAR™. Not because it sounded good in a workshop, but because I have lived it; through my years in the military, law enforcement and other covert activity, through fifty years of operating in the real world, and now through this.
Let me break down the way I’m using it.
Positive is about now. Not pretending everything is fine; choosing to see what is genuinely good in this moment. Right now, I am alive, recovering well, and able to write this. That is positive and true.
Optimism is about the positive future. Positivity lives in the present; optimism looks forward. I expect to recover, to return to my clients, and to keep doing the work I’m here to do. Is that guaranteed? No. Is it the most useful stance to take into treatment? Absolutely.
Factual is about the truth. What are the facts? What is the actual situation? The size of the tumour, where it was located, its nature, and the nature of the treatment likely to follow. No catastrophising, no denial; just the facts, faced squarely. You cannot deal effectively with a reality you refuse to look at.
Grateful, anyway. Grateful that I’ve come out of it so well so far. Grateful for the care and love Iโve received. And grateful for the experience itself; yes, even this one. Gratitude for what I am, what I have and what Iโve chosen.
Adaptable to the situation. I have adapted my whole life to every situation I’ve been thrust into. This is just the latest one. The situation changes, so I change with it and keep moving.
Resilient in the face of a chosen reality. Resilience isn’t something you’re issued with; it’s learned. Mine has been built over a long time, from the day I joined the army to right now.
So what can I report, having deployed POFGAR™ against a real and serious challenge?
The healing of the wound itself was remarkable. The nurses and doctors couldn’t understand how quickly an incision stretching from one side of my forehead to the other had healed; barely noticeable, just three weeks after the operation. Physically and mentally, I feel like nothing is wrong, even though something had been very wrong.
I credit most of this to the excellent care and love I received; I cannot fault either in any way. I also credit my own attitude. That attitude is built on POFGAR™.
Here is the question I’d put to you. When your test arrives, and it will, what attitude will you bring to it? Will you be running on Automatic, letting the situation dictate your thoughts and feelings? Or will you be on Manual, choosing your response deliberately?
I believe POFGAR™ can be deployed by anyone willing to do the work. I am advocating that people learn how to adopt it; not as theory, but as a practised, rehearsed and delivered way of meeting whatever comes.
I didn’t choose the tumour. I chose everything after it.
ยฉ David Deane-Spread, Metattude 2026. POFGAR™ is a trademark of Metattude.
