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What If You’re the Biggest Elephant in the Room?

July 30, 2020

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Photo by Charl Durand on Unsplash

“The Elephant in the Room” is that problem which everybody knows exists and won’t confront.

You’ll know you’re the problem, if you’re the boss and experience a few of these:

  1. Nobody challenges you – probably because you don’t like to be challenged.
  2. People won’t take the initiative.
  3. Too many people when explaining issues to you, don’t look you in the eye.
  4. Good people leave, saying that they’ve been made an offer they can’t refuse, or some other lie.
  5. You don’t get the ‘heads up’ you thought you’d get from the people you’d expect to receive it from.
  6. People tend to go quiet when you enter their space.
  7. You notice certain types of people ‘sucking’ up to you.
  8. People come to you for permission to do things that they should just do.
  9. People on the frontline avoid you.
  10. There’s too high a turnover in staff and nobody can give you a good reason for it.
  11. The business has plateaued, despite your attempts to grow it.
  12. You don’t like the workplace culture, but it doesn’t seem to change.
  13. You feel isolated.
  14. Most meetings are full of excuses and talking is mainly by you.
  15. You get the feeling that the people are there just for their pay.
  16. You feel angry or frustrated a lot.
  17. You may have issues at home as well.

If you can recognise a few on that list, you’ll benefit from taking a good hard look in the mirror.

To be fair, you don’t intend to be an a…hole, but that’s the impact you have.

The good news is that you can rapidly change, safely, without losing face or becoming ‘weak’ or ‘soft’.

You’ll need courage, coachability and commitment and your world could become so much more enjoyable and fruitful.

However, if you stubbornly decide to soldier on, without attempting to change, you’ll ultimately crash and burn.

You’re important to many people – yourself, your loved ones, your staff, your customers.

You and they deserve the opportunity to experience the best you.

I’ve committed the last 20-odd years helping people like you.

Respectfully, successfully and with no BS.

Give me a call (+61 416117771) or send me an email to arrange a confidential chat to see if we’re a fit.

Here’s what clients have said:

David Deane-Spread asks questions that make you rethink your leadership behaviours within the reality of your surroundings.

In my case it was putting into practice behaviours that I already knew but unable or unwilling to show; to allow my emotions to be present but always respectful.

Because leadership is a career long journey, there is a continual need to practice effective leadership behaviours and improve attitudinal competence.

In my experience David Deane-Spread offers coaching in a style akin to that of an advisor; to enhance existing capabilities, improve resilience and to develop both personally and professionally.

Peter Zadeian Executive Director, Land Asset Management Services  Department of Lands


David has helped me deliver positive, objectively measurable progress in both work and life, and has set a practical foundation that I can continue to reflect on and grow from.

He excels with a candid, no-nonsense, concrete style of coaching that is adaptable to needs, targets, and environment. It is coaching in the truest sense – it is about stretching, challenging, confronting, and growing.

To anyone truly wanting to improve and succeed in any endeavour, I recommend seeking out David and working with him to discover and develop your full potential.

Rob Hethorn Head of Improvement Minerals Australia BHP

My career had suffered some serious setbacks that had badly affected my commitment to my employer, my self-confidence, my ability see a positive future, and worse of all, my quality of life. I saw everything through a negative mask and wasn’t the person I wanted to be.

Over the course of only four sessions, David Deane-Spread was able to help me look at my situation objectively, regain my self-belief and determine a positive course of action for the future. No Kumbaya, just straight talking and common-sense critical analysis from someone who has been there and done that.

I unreservedly recommend David as an executive coach.

Philip Hine   Director Licensing and Regulation | Licensing and Regulation, Resources Safety, Department of Mines and Petroleum  Government of Western Australia

David Deane-Spread is a man of depth and substance who can assist any leader, team or process maximize performance. His wisdom is much welcomed and valued.

Glenn Capelli  Director & Presenter at Glenn Capelli Speaking

David has been my career coach for many years now. David is a humble, trustworthy person and I would trust David with my life. David’s coaching has helped me work through many difficult decisions and I am a better person at work and at home because of this.

Peter Rowles  Managing Director Prime Solutions Pty Ltd

I have served on the board as a Director of the same Company as David and know him to be a man of straight forward, down-to-earth common sense and cut-through business savvy. His reputation as a sound businessman and leader is widespread and unquestioned. You’d also be struggling to meet a nicer bloke.

Colin Pearce   Colin Pearce & Associates

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